The Tooth Fairy

Makenna just turned 8, and is in third grad, and the questions have started already:)  She lost a toothe on Friday, and we had to make a special trip to the orthodontist, because it was hanging in her mouth by the wire and brace attatched to it.  The orthodontist was nice enough to tell her, I believe the tooth fairy leaves more for teeth with braces on them.  Thanks a lot Dr. Bohmen!  So that night she asked in the car, "mom, is the tooth fairy real, or it the parents that leave the money".  Break my heart!  I did my best to convince her the Tooth Fairy is absolutely real, including going in my walled to show her that I have no cash, other than a seperate compartment that has heetrs and Aubrey's disney money.  Luckily she didn't see that area!  I had to borrow from it to leave her $5!  Of course we had another conversation about it at home, this time without Aubrey around.  It led to the Easter Bunny and Santa.  Oh goodness I am not ready for this.  I put on my best lying face and came up with all the best examples of why they are real, on top of pulling out, "you have to believe, or Santa doesn't come".  I think I have her convinced.  I will lie for as long as I can, and not feel guilty one bit, to just hold on to their little years for a bit longer.  What is Christmas without Santa, for mommy and daddy??  I know we will still make it special, but it is that Magic that makes it so much fun.  I would keep this up til she is a freshman in high school if I could!  And Aunt Sheri made a great point, it might keep the boys away;)  To end this story, today she had a regularly scheduled apt. at the ortho, and 3 more teeth fell out while we were there.  Yes, 3! I am going broke and losing my baby all at once!  It is so nerve-wracking tipping toeing into her room to do my duties, especially since she is on high alert, and determined to see the big T.F. Luckily for me, she has a bad cough and is on cough medicine, which seems to be helping her to sleep a little heavier.  Best news yet, ortho says 2 more are about to fall out:( And Aubrey's 2 bottoms are about top come out. They are growing up and I can't stop it! Love them so much, and want them little forever!  Truely good news, had my oncology check-up today and all my numbers were good!  So hoping to be around for along time to continue to watch them grow, and be so proud of the great girls they are. I don't think I tell them enough!  It is on my to-do list, to let them know more often, how proud I am of them.  I really am, I feel so lucky to be their mom. 

1st day of school

Today was the first day of school, 3rd for Makenna and kindergarten for Aubrey.  They both had a great day!  Makenna made 2 little friends that she played with at recess and sat with at lunch.  I am so relieved!  Aubrey was at the same table w/ Isaac, which I  worry could be a problem. I emailed the teacher, and she agreed, and will move them in the next week or two.  So happy it was a good day for the girls.  I had a very sad day.  New school years are always sad for me, I miss them so much.  I felt especially sad today, just because Makenna was starting a new school, and scared, and the girls don't really have friends yet.  I felt like I was the only mom in the school today that was crying.  Tony was with me, and assured me I wasn't.  I know each day will get better!  I love them so much, and hate that they are getting bigger, but am having so much fun with them at every stage. I love going to non-cartoon movies with Makenna and having special lunches out with Aubrey.  I have to remember this just means I will have more quality time with them.  We have had a tough summer, with not knowing anyone and living in the condo, this will be really good for them. Mommy will adjust too!  Hope they meet more friends tomorrow and come home with more smiles!

New school about to begin

School starts for the girls on Tuesday.  I am sad for them to start school again. It is always sad when summer ends and my days with them are shared with school.  We are all feeling very anxious about this new school year at a new school. Makenna is having a hard time and is afraid to start 3rd grade at her new school.  I feel so bad for her.  Wish I could protect her, or go with her all day:(

Mommy and Makenna time

Spent about an hour before bed tonight talking with Makenna.  We do this a lot.  She is such a ham.  She asks alot of questions, and we talk about many things.  I love this time with her. Tonight she was cracking me up, every time she talks about people she thinks are in love or dating, she starts batting her eyes and talking in a funny voice.  She is a very silly girl.  She told me when she grows up she wants to marry a man who is nice, very funny, in fact he needs to be born in the year of the monkey, because that means he is funny, and be handsome.  I thought that was a pretty good start. She also wants to be a jockey or someone in the olympics when she grows up.  The one thing I hope she always remembers me telling her, is to do what she loves.  What ever she is passionate about, that is what she needs to do, regardless of pay, etc.  Provided she can eat and have a roof over her head etc.  I pray she always follows her dreams!! She also asked why boys can show their boobies and girls can't!  That girl!  Sadly, I had no idea how to answer that one!

Aubrey's 5!

Today is Aubrey's 5th birthday.  She had a great day!  We went to the little waterpark called The Bay, and swam for four hours.  We had McDonalds for dinner, and then she got to pick out a movie to watch.  She chose Bambi, even though Makenna objected, the shooting scares her.  I think she picked it mostly because Mak objected.  Sisterly love!  They both got a bit sunburned today, which makes me feel really bad.  I am apparently not good at re-applying suncreen, need to work on that.  It was a very bittersweet day for me.  I did shed some tears at the pool, when the girls weren't nearby.  It is sad not having a four year old anymore.  5 seems so big.  I'm always sad when they get older, I just want to keep them little forever.  I love them so much, can't even imagine them in High school and college.  All and all it was a great day, and she was a very happy little 5 year old! Sunday we will have family over for a little party, with snacks and cake. I love you Aubrey! 

6/29/12

Not feeling good at all today, just really tired, run down and achy.  Every time I feel this way, or at least most of the time, I start to really worry that I am "sick" again, and that is very scary.  It seems like I have felt this way for weeks, even though logically I know it has just been a few days.  Although since we have arrived in Colorado I haven't felt great.  I know part is due to the stress of it all, but I also can't seem to breath at all, my allergies are terrible, and I am still adjusting to the altitude.  Still very homesick, Makenna as well.  We saw hermit crabs at the mall the other day, and she was obsessed with getting one, and decided to do 5 book reports to earn the money to buy one.  We got it last night, and she named it Ella Marie Looly.  So sweet.  If it makes her feel better, than I am happy, although this crab is more work than I imagined!  We have to spray it twice a day with distilled water!  She said she wanted the crab so she could talk to it, since she has no friends here:(

Makenna

Makenna asked me the other day if it is ok if she doesn't live at home during college.  The reason, she and Ella have plans to live together when they are in college.  They want to be roomates and when Hope and Aubrey are old enough, they can move in too.  So cute! She asked if she could switch schools.  She wants her and Ella to go to the college she chooses for 2 years, and then they will switch and go to the college Ella wants.  If it were only that easy;)  She and Ella have been skyping a lot since we moved, it is very cute, but also very sad how much they miss eachother!

Denver

Well I still can't seem to get it together enough and blog every night.  We have been living in Denver for less than a week, and I am really really sad.  I don't want to be here.  I want to go back to the place where my girls had too many friends and a great school, and papa around to take them to dinner every week.  I am very homesick, and Makenna is as well, which just breaks my heart.  We are considering moving back, at the expense of looking like complete fools.   I just don't want to mess up my girls!  I want to do the right thing.  I'm afraid if I wait it out a year, and still unhappy, to move them again, after they have made some roots here would be totally unfair.  If we decide to go back it has to happen quickly, which is scary! Will Tony find a job there? Can we get the house in Thornton sold?  Bottom line, above all, Love my girls more than anything, and never want to see them hurting like this again!  Tonight my heart aches with decisions that have to be made.

Waiting to move

I haven't blogged in so long, and am feeling really bad about it!  We are still in Wisconsin, staying at the Dehecks house, waiting to move on Friday.  Makenna is taking the move extremely hard, it really breaks my heart!!  Aubrey doesn't seem to be affected by it.  She mimics Makenna at times, and seems to cry, but gets over very quickly.  Luckily she is young enough to not quite get it.  I just don't know what to do or say to Mak any more.  She cries all the time.  I feel so bad for her.  If I had any idea it would be this hard on her, I would have said no to this move.  I am really sad as well. We have such wonderful friends here, we will miss them dearly! I hope she is happier when we get there!  We have decided to call this week the countdown of really bad days.  Today was bad day number 1, we are glad that it is over.  She seems to laugh when I call it that.  Anything to make her smile. On a lighter note, Aubrey rode a bike without training wheels for the first time tonight!! I am so proud of her.  It seems to come very natural to her, she did it right away, fingers crossed it continues in Colorado!

5/1/2012

Took the girls out of school early today and took them to their dentist appointments and then took Mak to the orthodontist.  Very busy packing, getting ready to move out of this house on Webster st. next weekend.  Then we will be staying with my great friend, the Dehecks for 3 weeks. Hopefully we will have a little fun with our friends before we have to say goodbye.

4/30/2012

Wow, it has been a long time since I have blogged!  Really busy with the big move coming up.  We have finally found a place to live within the boundries of Meridian Elementary, the school we really want the girls to go to.  Sadly, it is only 2 bedrooms.  I am scared about how tight things are going to be in the condo, especially since my mom will be staying there with us until she finds a job.  Lots of packing to do by next week, bit stressed:(  On another note, having a second grader is quite interesting.  Today I found out, her little friend Mason Deheck tricked her into saying the "f" word.  It really upset me, especially since she said "by mommy, I didn't even know that word, and that it was a bad word".  She seems to young for these things to be happening.  Also, don't know if I wrote about the little boy Aaron Zalewski in her class, he has a crush on her!  Pretty sure it is mutual, but she is not about to admit it to me. It's kind of cute, and sad all at the same time. Don't think I'm ready for this...

4/19/2012

Yesterday was a rough day, for 2 reasons; Aubrey lost her 2nd tooth, actually Lauri pulled it out for her (yuck), she's only 4!  Then I got word that a boy in the 2nd grade has a crush on Makenna!  She keeps asking me if she can have a playdate w/ Aaron Zalewski, turns out he has a bit of a crush on her, and she may as well, but won't admit it to me.  I'm not ready for all this.  I just want them to stay little, and sweet.  Making matters worse, I worked at the American Club tonight, and it was prom!  All I could think about all night, is my girls being that age and how scary it is for a parent.  I really pray I've done a good job raising them and that they make good choices, not perfect choices, but overall, good ones.  Just wish I could protect them forever, but I know that is not possible.  I did proclaim to my co-workers that I will be chaperoning the prom.  Wonder if that will really happen, or if they will insist that I don't. I hope not:) 

Easter

Had a fun day of Easter festivities with my girls.  Tomorrow is Easter and I have to work at the American Club so we made the best of today.  We went to 2 Easter egg hunts, Makenna won a prize at both of them!  We dyed our eggs, and went to the Nelsons for dinner.  Great day, sad to work tomorrow.  Hope this is the last Easter I ever have to work.  Then on Monday we are off to Denver for a week.  Hopefully I will get our living and school situation all worked out:)

Museum

Had a great and exhausting day today chaperoning Makenna's 2nd grade fieldtrip to the Milwaukee Public Museum.  She had a great time.  I had a group of 6 girls which was a bit overwhelming, didn't want to lose any of them, but all in all, they all did great. Had to work tonight, but happy to get to spend the next 4 days w/ the girls and then the day after Easter we are off to Colorado for a week. 

Sad day/Good Day

Today was a hard day filled with challenges and triumph.  This morning I had my 6 month apt with my oncologist.  It has been 4 1/2 years since I had cancer.  Even though it has been so long I still have so much anxiety over these apt's. First was the pelvic exam w/ Dr. Hoogerland, everything was good. Next bloodwork.  Since my apt was early in the day I was able to call late this afternoon and get results-Good news as well.  So much relief.  Also today Aubrey had her stitches taken out.  Again she was a very brave girl and sat like a champ for the doctor.  Now to keep her calm for the next couple weeks so she doesn't split the wound open.  Mama would not do well with that:)  Worst thing of all today, was news that my cousin Nicole was in ICU for an overdose.  She attempted to take her life last night.  Very sad day.  She is improving and it looks like she will pull through which is an obvious relief, but leaves so much pain and sadness for her and her family.  I am so sad for her kids.  They are only 8 and 10, and must be so worried and confused.  Nicole has battled many female diseases, that are quite painful and had just had enough, so we suspect.  I have had a huge pit in my stomach all day just worrying about her and her kids.  I really pray tomorrow is good news and that she is out of the woods.  I hope they are also able to help her heal in many other ways!

Braces

Well braces are on, and she was a champ!  It went very quick and smooth.  She has been quite a bit sore, I feel bad for her, I remember how uncomfortable it can be. It is going to be 60 degrees today, very exciting.  No big plans, hopefully I'll come up with something to do in this beautiful weather.

Aubrey the brave!

Well I've hit a new milestone, Aubrey is my first to get stitches!  Yikes,  we all know I don't do well with blood, especially not when it is gushing from my sweet little four year olds head.  Tony took the girls to Possibility Playground on Saturday, and Aubrey tripped and fell and on her way down, her head hit a bolt on the equiptment.  He rushed her home where I was, and yelled for me.  She had blood everyone, running down her face, all over her clothes and her hands were covered.  It was absolutely heartbreaking!  I held her in the back seat of the car as we rushed to the ER.  From the time we got in the car, she never cried.  The only thing she said, is "mommy keep holding it in the same spot", referring to the rag I was holding over her wound.  At the hospital they put shots in the wound to numb her, cleaned it out really well, and put in 8 stitches.  She never flinched or cried, or even complained.  I am so proud of her!  Still trying to figure out where she got her toughness from, certainly not me!  She was so brave.  I have to admit, I kept it together, but barely.  Inside I was freaking out.  I wanted to cry and throw up at the same time.  I really don't do well seeing my kids hurt, and hate where my mind takes me, the worry I have about what may be wrong.  She looked like she was in a war zone, and it was devestating to me, but I did manage to stay calm.  She relieved she is ok. Love my girls to pieces, and pray this is the worst that happens to them! So proud of my brave little trooper!

3/21/12

I have been without a computer since last week, and not able to blog for a while.  Tony is really struggling with us being in another state.  I feel bad for him, don't really know how to help.  I thought about letting Aubrey fly back with him this Sunday when he returns to Denver, and having her stay until we go there in 2 weeks.  I'm a bit relieved, with it being short notice, the ticket was just too expensive.  It would be very hard for me to be away from her for 2 weeks! Hopefully he will have a good weekend being back home with us. Makenna is in the play Aladdin through the park and rec, and she loves it.  She has a small part (1 sentance, and 2 words at another point), and is so excited.  I am very proud of her, and can't wait to it in May!

Words of Wisdom

I really hope that Tony and I are able to afford to pay at least some if not all of the girls college expenses, and if we are not financial able, I hope that they work hard to get scholarships or work through college to pay for it.  I would hate to see them stuck with student loan debt, it just doesn't seem to go away. On a lighter note, I am really starting to notice how funny Aubrey is at times.  She has quite the sense of humor.  Tonight at dinner, she was mimicking things I would normally say, just being funny.  I asked if she was copying someone and she said yes, and pointed at me.  She knows what she is doing.  She is started to get having a sense of humor, it's really cute, even when it is at my expense.  Of course Makenna was dying of laughter.  She has to cover her ears at dinner if Aubrey is funny, so that she doesn't spit out her food from laughing!

Birthday

Well tomorrow is my birthday, and tonight at dinner Makenna told me not to set my alarm in the morning.  She said she is going to make sure she wakes up by 7'oclock (usually we get up at 7:30), she is going to feed herself and Aubrey breakfast, get her and Aubrey dressed, beds made and everything she needs to do she will get done, and then she will wake me up when it is time to go.  Such a sweet girl I have, not sure how I got so lucky!  Aubrey was excited because she wants to pick out her own shirt, and will let Makenna pick out pants that match the shirt:)

Braces

Big day today, Makenna is getting braces put on!  She is so excited, and I don't have the heart to burst her bubble, and tell her she will probably be in pain:(

2/26/12

Spent the weekend sick:( On a happy note, found out this week that 2 of my best freinds are having babies! Both due in October, excited to hold a little baby again:) Hope some day in the not too distant future I will have another of my own.  Not sure if that is in the cards for us, would be a huge blessing if it was, and if it isn't, I have 2 huge blessings all ready!

Girlfriends

Very greatful for the wonderful friends I have in Amy and Lauri, whom are always there to take care of my kids for me when I need them and love them as well! Looking forward to repaying the favor tomorrow and have Cooper over for a playdate with Aubrey.  When he got in my car today after school, he said to me "guess what I called Aubrey today?"  Puzzled and maybe a bit scared to hear his response, I ask him what and  he responds "Cutie".  How damn cute is that!  He then says, "well she is". Love!

2/22/12

Had to work at the American Club tonight. Boo!

2/15/12

We had a great Valentines day!  We did miss Tony, but excited he is coming home in 2 days!

2/21/12

Lazy day with the girls.  Makenna and I played battleship and scrabble, and Aubrey took a small nap.

2/18/12

Makenna sang beautifully at the talent show, brought myself and others to tears !! I am so proud of her.  She went up and sang  "I had the Best Day with you"by Taylor Swift as though she has always known it.  I loved it.  Before the show started my little Aubrey who is only 4, lost her 1st tooth! I was devestated by this!  She is too liitle, it is too soon.  Very sad for mommy!! Toothfairy came, she got $5 for her 1st tooth:)

2/15/12

We had a great Valentines day!  We did miss Tony, but excited he is coming home in 2 days!

2/13/12

Went to the planetarium w/ Aubrey's class today.  The professor asked which planet is the hottest, and Aubrey knew the answer!  I was so proud!  Then tonight I set her up with her own folder with sites of educational games, she played for the first time and was so excited and did so well!  Makenna stayed up late tonight, she was set on getting my Valentines card made before tomorrow!  So sweet.  I told her to just do it tomorrow, and she started to cry.  I couldn't bear seeing her like that, so I let her stay up and finish it.  Can't wait to see it!  Big plans tomorrow for Valentines day.  I mixed red dye w/ water to write them a note in the snow (hope it works!).  Making Mak a pb sandwich w/ cut out heart in the middle w/ pink sprinkles (will make something similiar for Aubrey, but she doesn't like pb..).  Heart pizza's for dinner, and pink and red sprinkles on cupcakes for dessert.  Of course, they will both wake up to a box of chocolate as well.  Love, love my girls.  Now to figure out something special to do for dad a thousand miles away..

2/12/12

Spent most of the day making valentines for the girls to take to school on Tuesday.  The valentine said "You light up my world Valentine"  and had a ring that lit up attatched to it.  Turned out very cute, girls are excited about them.  I think next year we'll stick to the $2.50 pack that comes with candy or a pencil, and takes about 10 minutes to write your name.

2/10/12

Long night at work, missed my girls a lot!  Trying to find something fun to do with them tomorrow night..May Take Kenna to a movie, for some special mommy makenna time.

2/7/12

Aubrey was talking about Grandma Adams being an angel, tonight.  It was very sweet, she said "she can see me at night".  Then she said "mommy you're an angel" and I replied, "not yet, because I haven't died" and she said "you're an angel, because you are pretty and a mommy".  Love!

2/5/12

Aubrey did the monkey bars for the first time all by herself today!  It was so cute, she went really fast so that she would have enough momentum to get across.  Of course she wanted to do it again, then, to show Makenna.  Makenna was proud, it was very sweet!

2/4/12

Went snowboarding for the first time today with Lauri, it was awesome!  I can't wait to do it again!  Unless, of course, my knees are permanently damaged..

Have to add, our trainer said we did very well:)

2/1/12

Makenna and I are having a rough day, just butting heads.  She is really missing her daddy, and I'm sure that is part of it, and I am a bit crabby today as well.  She said tonight she thinks daddy is sad a lot.  Not sure where that came from, but she seems to be worried about him and that broke my heart.  That girl is definitely a lover!

1/29/12

Tony lost our stainless-steel refrigerator over the side of his pick-up truck on the Iowa highway:(

1/28/12

Had dinner at Jeremy and Andrea's house tonight. Had a great time Tony's last night before heading back to Colorado, it's going to be a long 4 months!  .  Girls were very sad at bedtime when they had to say goodbye to daddy:(

1/25/12

Aubrey was home sick today, she had a fever, headache and the chills.  I hate seeing my babies sick! Tonight she seems to be doing better, hopefully she can go to school tomorrow.  Tony leaves on Saturday to head back to Colorado.  That transition is going to be very hard on all of us.  June can't get here fast enough!

1/25/12

Aubrey was home sick today, she had a fever, headache and the chills.  I hate seeing my babies sick! Tonight she seems to be doing better, hopefully she can go to school tomorrow.  Tony leaves on Saturday to head back to Colorado.  That transition is going to be very hard on all of us.  June can't get here fast enough!

1/22/12

Today was a Great day!!  We all went to sunburst for some fun in the snow.  I took Aubrey tubing.  She did great, we made it 2 hours.  It was so much fun.  She was able to pull her tube and stand on the conveyor belt up to the top of the hill.  We sat in seperate tubes, but I held her rope to keep us together down the hill.  At one point she decided, mid-hill, to get on top of the tube and lay on her stomach like a bird flying through the air.  Gave me a little heart-attack, but she loved it, and went down like that the rest of the day.  Tony took Makenna for her first ski lesson.  She did awesome, I am so proud of her!  After Aubrey and I were done, we had dinner with Mak and daddy and then got to watch her go down the bunny hill a bunch of times.  It was so cute.  The hardest part for her was getting up the rope lift.  We all had such a great time, and can't wait to go again.  Next time,  I think we will get lessons for Aubrey:}

1/21/2012

Girls are having a great time, they spent the night by Auntie Carols last night, and are at the urban ecology center today for storytime in a teepee.  Tony and I went to dinner at Fila Bene in Mequon and saw the movie Extremely Loud Incredibly Close, which was terrible.  I miss my girls and hope I get to see them before I go to work this afternoon.

1/19/2012

Chaperoned Makenna's brownie troop on an outing to the Humane Society. Kids had a great time looking at all the doggies and kittens:) Got my hair done tonight, glad to feel back to myself again, and so happy to have my greys covered.

1/18/2012

Makenna had Abby over for a playdate after school today, they had a great time doing a science fair and making special potions!

1/18/2012

Aubrey asked today if people are alive in heaven.She talks a lot about dying, heaven, and death lately.  She asks a lot of questions I don't have  a clue how to answer.  Luckily the conversation usually refers back to Grandma Adams.  She said Grandma is not dead anymore because she is an angel. Makenna has been very emotional lately.  Not sure what is going on with her, if it is because we are moving in a few months.. I worry about her, but I know she is a tough cookie, just a very sensitive little girl, with so much love in her heart.  Everyday I am reminded how blessed I am for the my two beauties!!

1/17/2012

Had a great night hanging out with my girlfriends Amy (better known as "G") and Lauri.  Girlfriends are definitely good for the soul.  We shared many funny stories, including one about someone's child having a third nipple, which I had never heard of! I love having friends in my life that make me laugh so much, even when it is about myself:) Also realized, with the help of said friends, that I need to spend a little more time appreciating my husband.  So I am going to work on that:)

1/15/2012

We all had a great time today at SimonGilhooly's 2nd birthday party.  It was at the harborside inn, at the pool. Lauri and I are making Simon a canvas with leave shapes cut from old clothes and blankets of his.  We didn't quite get it finished in time, but Aubrey was sweet enough to give him some of her toys she no longer needed:) Tonight Aubrey asked me when I am bigger, what do I want to be?  Tough question, still not sure.  I did mention photography, she really thought I should want to be an artist instead.  When she grows up she wants to be everything, that is everything that girls are.  Makenna wants to be a football player?!?!  She started crying when I told her girls aren't usually professional football players.  Then I felt bad, who am I to say she couldn't be a football player, especially when all I ever tell them is they can be whatever they want, as long as it makes them happy.  Not rich, truly happy!

1/10/2012

Girls are so happy to have daddy back home!  Tried to figure out the school situation in Colorado, very confusing and stressful!

1/10/2012

"Mom, I think God and Santa Clause are brothers. and I think the Easter bunny and St. Nick are brothers." Aubrey:)

1/9/2012

Tony accepted an offer today from Comcast, looks like we moving back to denver.  Mixed feelings!

1/5/1012

Aubrey proclaimed tonight that she is going to marry Jacob Deheck...who is 10.  She then said that when he died she was going to marry Cooper, and when he dies,well she'll marry Mason.  Too cute.  Makenna at dinner exposed Tony's secret to Papa, that he hates Newport Shores(one of grandpa's favorite places to take us) and tells her every time we are on our way to go there. Good thing daddy wansn't there, hopefully I remember to tell him that is "secret" has been revealed.

1/4/2012

Did  some work w/ Aubrey on her sight words, she seems very interested! I did have to put her to bed early tonight as punishment since she bit her sister in the car!  Thought that stage was over.

1/3/2012

Made it back safely from Colorado last night.  Girls went back to school today, but this afternoon Makenna came down with the stomach flu:( Hope my sweet girl is better tomorrow, and that my other tootsie doesn't get it next!